What Do I Do If My Child Does Not Want To Have Visitation With My Ex?

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It is that familiar scene -your ex pulls up to your house to pick up the children, only your child starts crying, “I don’t want to go. I want to stay here with you.” What do you do?

 Your job is to encourage your child to be with the other parent and to facilitate their relationship. Even if you don’t believe it, you have to praise your ex and talk up the visit. You may have to be firm, refuse to negotiate with the child and simply say, you are going to spend time with the other parent.

You want to avoid any conduct that could result in your being accused of interfering with the visit. Alienating conduct will not be condoned by a court and could result in a change in the custody arrangement.

Of course, these general rules assume that the child does not have a legitimate reason for not wanting to see the other parent. Obviously, if the child’s heath or well-being is imperiled or the child is being exposed to improper behaviors, you should seek the appropriate intervention.

Children should be encouraged to have relationships with both parents. Ideally, the parents should work together so that the transitions are drama and trauma free. There could be many reasons why a child would be resistant to spending time with the parent. If the child reluctance is persistent, family counseling may be in order.   On the other hand, if vistiation order or parenting plans are being violated, you should seek legal counsel.



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